“We are gonna kill it tonight, man! After all: Beer, Pot, Sex and Wine, Helix class of Seventy-NINE!”We high-fived and laughed and hooted and hollered. Probably scared the underclassmen a bit, made them jealous, I’m sure of it.Beer, pot, sex and wine… well three out of four ain’t bad? Sigh… I hate to have to admit this, but I managed to escape high school with my virginity completely intact. Fuck! No female had ever seen my dick since infancy. What kind of life am I leading? Ack!Tons of uglier guys got laid, but not me. Even fricking Jeff David Harmeyer got laid, and he was a dick! But, I had Zero game. I was terribly shy, partly because of my teenage acne which was, thankfully, clearing up, but also my upbringing was by a pretty strict mother; I was taught to totally respect women. Which is good, really. But I also thought it meant don’t inflict my nasty, sex-obsessed, masturbating self on them. Good girls don’t want that kind of thing. Okay, yeah, I was stupid. But that’s really. "Never mind," he said, rolling on to the bed and presenting his asshole to me. "Start rimming me. Show your Daddy how good you eat ass." Not my thing," I said."Get your tongue down there, you queer little whore." Not my thing," I repeated. "And I think I made it pretty clear about being called names." I was smiling and doing my very best to be affable and polite. This guy was an asshole, but he was a guest. My instinct for hospitality was at war with my impulse to slap his face sideways."Tongue fuck your Daddy's asshole, faggot," he groaned, fingering his butt.The smile left my face. "Have you been LISTENING?!?" I snarled. "This is totally getting off on the wrong foot!"The old man turned to my wife and beckoned with his hand, "Get over here, bitch, and sit on my face." THAT DOES IT!!" my wife roared, grabbing her clothes. "I'm going to the bathroom to change and brush my teeth. When I come out, you need to be gone!" She stomped out and slammed the door."What's her problem?" he.
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